đ By Quill & Candlelight – The Dispatches of Colonel Shufflebottom on the Matter of Colonial Nonsense
đď¸ July 31st, 1775 â Maryland, regrettably entrepreneurial
Today, the Province of Marylandânever one to miss a chance for fiscal flamboyanceâhas begun printing its own currency! I held one such note in my hand. It promised value, liberty, and a vague sense of optimism. Much like a tavern menu written in Latin.
The bills feature allegorical scenes of Britannia, Liberty, and what I believe to be King George III attempting arson. Itâs unclear whether this is symbolic or simply a critique of his domestic skills. Either way, the artistry is bold, the ink is damp, and the economic implications are somewhere between âambitiousâ and âadorably delusional.â
I am told the currency is backed by gunpowder and good intentions. Which is to say, it is backed by neither gold nor logic. Franklin would approveâhe once tried to electrify a turkey. Now the colonies electrify commerce with leaf-printed parchment and revolutionary enthusiasm.
I weep for the pound.
Ever skeptical of fiscal improvisation,
Colonel Archibald Shufflebottom, 47th Regiment of Foot
Defender of Empire, Critic of Colonial Coinage & Illustrated Insolence
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